the things kids say

[druidsam]

shamelessly stoled from another forum

Junior School Children Writing about the Sea. Priceless!!!
1) This is a picture of an octopus. It has eight testicles.(Kelly age 6)

2) Oysters' balls are called pearls. (James age 6)

3) If you are surrounded by sea you are an island. If you don't have sea all around you, you are incontinent. ( Wayne age 7)

4) Sharks are ugly and mean, and have big teeth, just like Emily Richardson. She's not my friend no more. (Kylie age 6)

5) A dolphin breaths through an arsehole on the top of its head. (Billy age 8)

6) My uncle goes out in his boat with pots, and comes back with crabs. (Millie age 6)

7) When ships had sails, they used to use the trade winds to cross the ocean. Sometimes, when the wind didn't blow, the sailors would whistle to make the wind come. My brother said they would be better off eating beans. (William age 7)

8) I like mermaids. They are beautiful, and I like their shiny tails. How do mermaids get pregnant? (Helen age 6)

9) I'm not going to write about the sea. My baby brother is always screaming and being sick, my dad keeps shouting at my mum, and my big sister has just got pregnant, so I can't think what to write. (Amy age 6)

10) Some fish are dangerous. Jellyfish can sting. Electric eels can give you a shock. They have to live in caves under the sea where I think they have to plug themselves into chargers. (Christopher age 7)

11) When you go swimming in the sea, it is very cold, and it make my willy small. (Kevin age 6)

12) Divers have to be safe whey they go under the water. Two divers can't go down alone, so they have to go down on each other. (Becky age 8)


13) On holiday my mum went water skiing. She fell off when she was going very fast. She says she won't do it again because water shot up her fanny. (Julie age 7)
____________________



...................Sam

[Mickie]

PMSL at no 13

[grotbag]

no 2

[lady clara]

Originally Posted by Mickie

PMSL at no 13

Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha hahaha!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!

[Rocks]

Things mother say to their kids:

Don't come running to me if you break your legs

No 12


Sammy

[deano]

Brilliant, bless em

brings to mind our Danny's early years speech impediment. he couldn't pronounce words beginning with "sm", instead using "f" - and (this was about 15 years ago when child abuse was headline news) used to tell people that his daddy had facked his bottom when he was naughty

[indie]

went to rockingham speedway 2 years ago, a few of us, one mate had his two sons with him aged 7 and 8 half way through one of the races (BRSCC Racing featuring Pickup Trucks) huge crash involving around 7 cars happened on the bend infront of us, the crowd went quiet, as the dust cleared mates youngest son stood on this chair and in the silence around us pointed at the wrecked cars and said, hes dead hes dead hes dead, just as he pointed at the 4th car and about to shout hes dead, the drivers head appeared from the window followed by his hand, mate son then shouted and he should be dead, dont know who laughed the most myself and friends or the crowd in the stand

[Spree]

Originally Posted by deano

Brilliant, bless em

brings to mind our Danny's early years speech impediment. he couldn't pronounce words beginning with "sm", instead using "f" - and (this was about 15 years ago when child abuse was headline news) used to tell people that his daddy had facked his bottom when he was naughty

LMFAO - just seen this thread and had to read half of it through tears

[Tonyxxv97]

My son when he was about 4 years old his Granddad gave him a pound coin, he said nothing?

I asked him “what do you say Sam”, he said “Anymore”………I think he will go far.